This week's QOTW focused on who would we tell if we were HIV positive. Being diagnosed with HIV would be devastating enough, but I can't imagine if I were shunned by family and/or friends after disclosing my status. In reading my fellow classmates' posts, I wonder if their families would be as supportive as they think. And I'm not talking about the posts for this QOTW.
Some of the answers I've been reading in response to these situations that have been given to us have been a little close minded. I don't disrespect anyone's family situation or opinion, because it is just that. But if we are close minded to the idea of being around or helping someone who is HIV positive, how do you think our friends, family, and children are going to react? I would imagine much in the same way.
I treat everyone in the same manner that I expect to be treated. That is with love, respect, and an open mind. And that's why even when it comes to close minded people, I have to be open minded. You never know when there is another learning opportunity, and every person, place, and thing I come into contact with in this life is a mini lesson to be learned.
Did You Know?
Scientists have developed an HIV Stigma Scale to determine top reason why one would not disclose their status to others. In 2006 researchers embarked on a study to determine reasons for disclosure and more importantly, reasons for non-disclosure in HIV positive women. The study was specifically targeting women and their disclosure/non-disclosure habits with their children.
Reasons for non-disclosure included allowing the child to have a "carefree childhood," afraid of the stress it would put on oneself and the child, and fear of the child telling others and being exposed to HIV stigma. Not surprisingly, those mothers that had already reported facing HIV stigma were less likely to tell their children about their HIV status. While this study didn't prove conclusively that stigma plays a huge role in our disclosure habits, it showed that it does have an impact. It also referenced a study that stated the contrary, in that stigma does have a major impact and how we steer our disclosure decisions.
What kind of world do we live in when we can't even share what would most likely be the most devastating news to our children? And the reason why we can't disclose this information is fear of how people on the outside would think of us? We should learn to love and honor our family and those closest to us, and live and let live with the rest. I know it's easier said than done, but focusing on other's reactions will not help one's cause. We can only positively use what is at our disposal: our friends and family that will support us. The rest is just a negative mark on our emotional support system.
I like how your did you know was related to the question of the week. I agree that according to some earlier posts from our classmates, it is hard to tell if their family and friends would be as receptive as they think. I know that certain people I associate with would treat me different, which is why I wouldn't want them to know my business. Who did you decide to tell?
ReplyDeleteI have two dear friends that are HIV positive. They are basically like my parents. So it only seemed natural to tell them. Other people I would tell would be close friends. I don't think anyone around me would discriminate...I've been working in an infectious disease practice for 15 years so the people I surround myself with are pretty open minded. I consider myself lucky!
ReplyDeleteI am still not sure how my friends would react if I told them I was HIV positive, but at least I know I could depend on my family. If I had to go through it by myself I would probably fail miserably. I could not stand going to the doctors by myself let alone feeling sick and having to out on a happy face at school and work.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the Did You Know, It is one that everyone needs to pay more attention to.